Negativity + <3

nobody@vox.com(DelusionalAngel) — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 09:49:04 -0800

I'm on a negativity strike...
Tonight someone told me I had a good attitude as we talked about MS and my headaches, etc. A few hours later my normal decent mood faded temporarily. I was being bombarded by just pure negativity is so many directions I can't begin to list them. Life is not bad 24 hour a day, every day. On my worst days, when I think my head is trying to kill me, when I can barely stay awake yet can't sleep, when my whole body is numb and painfully tingly or just pained, I can still find something positive. Try it. The worst day of my life thus far was the day I learned CynDee died. I still found love and was able to appreciate that, though it was tough. I could still say thank you to those helping me through it.

Malibu homes are still smoldering... be glad you didn't just lose your home (some of the most expensive houses in the country I think). Be glad you're not dying a slow painful death. Be glad you have friends or family that love you. Be glad for something... I don't expect all cheery all of the time, that would annoy me and make me question your sanity. If you do have a serious issue, I'm there for you. If you don't abuse my kindness and love for you, I'm here. A little hehe moment in the midst of all of the negative crap is good. Guilt trips... I'm on strike from those too. Keep them to yourself, they won't work and will just make me grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

In the they keep me sane department:
I did get to talk to Mijn Favoriet more than usual. We're not always online at the same times for more than a few minutes at a time. We have plenty of real chats but on an average day we're usually only guaranteed a "hi!", a few *KENK* (our own word) messages, and perhaps a "morning" or "nn sleep well". And yet he always seems to be there to talk when I am about to snap. Guess his SUPER psychic powers aren't as ev0l as I usually claim them to be. <3

I also got to talk to Meneer Bot, which is very good since he'd been busy for the last few months and we really needed to reconnect. I apologized tonight, mostly for things he says I didn't need to apologize for. The truth is I wasn't fair to him in the past. What I was dealing with when I snapped made me re-think some things and I did owe him a BIG apology. <3

I got to watch Misi try to explain try to explain the term "doggy style" to mijn favoriet because I told her he couldn't translate that to Dutch, heh. <3 I should have just pasted those irc logs here, instead of the I hate negativity rant. *grijnst*

Oh and Brian listened to me bitch about people who are making me feel Bitchy <3

This was long, I tried to keep it short but wanted to make a point...

♥ Ik hou van jullie allemaal ♥

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Delusional Rants...

Negativity + <3